Ask the Law Guy

My fiance desperatly wants to get custody of his two children (10 and 12). They are from California were the mother lives and have been living with us for 5 months in North Carolina. This week he was granted emergency temporary custody by judge in Cal. during a hearing on child support the mom did not attend. The custody was granted because the mother had complaints at her address of loud music and illegal drugs and also lied several months earlier about getting remarried. What steps does he need to take now to get custody in North Carolina? If it is to get "full custody" in North Carolina, does this overrule anything in California? We are concerned because it is likely they will go to California to visit the grandparents this summer.

Last concern is.. the 10 year old is a boy who was labled "emotionally disturbed." After 5 months here, the schools have determined he is not "emotionally disturbed" and he is going to go to a regular school next fall (a big sign of his improvemtents ). He HATES it here though and wants to go back to California because "we have too many rules and he can do whatever he wants in California." How much say will this have for custody? What, if anything, will help our case to show improvements from the "structure" we are providing?

Any help you can provide would be GREATLY appreciated. Thanks

California courts will have to decide about permanent custody of the children. Once one state has taken jurisdiction over the case other states are supposed to stay out of it unless the court in California releases jurisdiction.

Most courts will listen to what children have to say about where they want to live, but children, especially young ones, have no right to decide who they will live with.

Three years ago we purchased a piece of property and stipulated a shared underground dog fence be removed, it is still active and under our property however. Since then we have shared our build as plot plan with our neighbors and discovered a previously hidden stockade fence is on our property. They even back filled with construction debris into our woods when they leveled their tenants yard. They built a deck which violates the zoning setbacks. Our neighbors planned to pave a new driveway as much as 10" onto our property. We informed the paving company (even with a fax) but they ignored us too, knocked over our stakes and paved as requested anyway. We had granted permission for the neighbors to keep their 3 mailbox on our property, since they sighted safety concerns to the alternative. When their visitors continued to run over our berry bushes we paid for a recorded staked 81X survey to try and bring some clarity to the issue. They show our attempts no respect and continue to assert ownership rights, and refuse to respect our lot line still. We would like to insist that they remove their fences, "No Trespassing" sign, new pavement, the mailboxes but mostly the underground fence because twice now their dogs have broken the skin of people with their teeth (we were trying to retrieve balls from the edge of their yard). Their driveway plowing damages our berry and arborvitae bushes and spreads rocks into our grass every year. Is there a no trespassing form we could have notarized and sent to them return receipt requested? We want our land returned to us and hate to bother lawyers when common sense should do. We would greatly appreciate any peaceful suggestions your experience has shown to be effective.

Land ownership is the legally recognized right to exercise dominion and control over land within boundaries. A landowner can exclude others from the property and prevent intrusions from other people or their chattels. If you do not want the underground fence there you can ask them to remove it and if they do not comply remove it yourself and sue them for the cost of removing it. The same rule applies if you can show they are dumping construction debris on your property.

The actual problem you have is inconsiderate neighbors. You can and should try compromise and mediation (using a local mediation organization) to try to reach a solution that satisfies you both. If that doesn't work you have three options: let it go, sue, or move. Through a lawsuit you should probably be able to get a court to either order your neighbor to correct the intrusions or pay you for your costs in having the things removed.

I once had a dispute with a nieghbor over a tree just on my side of the property line. He wanted me to cut it down since it dropped leaves on his cars. It was a big tree, I liked it and I did not want to cut it down. I did hire an arborist to remove some branches that hung over his property, even though I was not legally obligated to. He was never satisfied and it remained a sore spot until I moved away for other reasons. I guess the moral is that the law can only do so much, you can make it unpleasant and expensive for your neighbors to intrude on your property, but a lawsuit won't make them more considerate.

Good luck.


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